The Misunderstood Performance Review: How Executives and Assistants Can Optimize Their Review
Performance reviews have a reputation problem. To some, they feel like a bureaucratic time-suck. To others, they’re a judgment day no one asked for.
And yet—when done right—they can be one of the most powerful tools for growth, alignment, and motivation on your team.
Let’s be clear:
👍🏼 75% of employees believe feedback is valuable and impacts their performance.
👎🏻 But a third of performance reviews actually make performance worse.
Why? Because traditional reviews are often delivered poorly, lack clarity, and feel like a pointless formality. But that’s not feedback’s fault. That’s a leadership problem—and a culture problem.
When done right, performance reviews create accountability, deepen trust, and reinforce a shared sense of purpose. They’re an essential part of building a culture of feedback, which researchers have found is one of the most critical drivers of positive organizational outcomes.
So, how can executives and assistants make sure their performance reviews actually make an impact in the right direction?
FOR PRINCIPALS: How to Make Performance Reviews Actually Work
Even when you know the value of reviews, the process can still be… brutal. 63% of executives say their biggest challenge is having tough conversations. And let’s face it—not everyone reacts well to feedback. Some people don’t even take compliments well.
Humans are weird.
If you want your review process to drive change and not just tick a box, here’s what you must do:
1. Collect the Right Kind of Evidence
Yes, numbers matter. But not every role has metrics—and that’s not the employee’s fault.
If you’re reviewing someone in a support or operations role, look at how they work, not just what they produce. Notice their attitude. Their professionalism. Their contribution to team morale or problem-solving. Pay attention to the quiet wins.
The best way to review an assistant’s work? Measure your own success during the same timeframe. What used to stress you out that no longer does? What’s happening automatically without needing a reminder? What has become easier?
Guess what? Your assistant is likely behind all of that.
Recognize when someone stepped up, stayed late, helped a peer, handled a tough client with grace, or lived out your company’s values in a meaningful way. Then document it. Say it. Reinforce it.
2. Use Content and Context
Giving feedback isn’t about opinion—it’s about clarity. And clarity requires both:
Content: What specifically happened, using facts, data, or observable behavior.
Context: Why it mattered and what the impact was on you, the team, or the organization.
If you can’t back up your claims with specifics? You risk sounding petty, not principled. Here’s the difference:
Instead of, “You’ve been dropping the ball lately,”
Try: The briefing packet went out late, which created a scramble on my end and affected how I was able to prepare—ultimately causing a delay in my own delivery.
This grounds the conversation in facts, not feelings. And it gives your assistant the clarity they need to actually adjust.
3. Focus on the Future
Performance reviews should never be an airing of past grievances. They are not a courtroom transcript. They are your chance to course correct, reset expectations, and outline what "great" looks like going forward.
So instead of obsessing over what went wrong, shift the focus to what needs to happen next. What do you want to see more of? What needs to shift? What support do they need from you to get there? Make it actionable. Make it specific. Reviews should spark progress, not shame.
FOR ASSISTANTS: Stop Dreading Performance Reviews—Start Owning Them
Let’s talk real for a second.
If you’ve ever walked into a performance review feeling like you’re about to be judged, evaluated, or picked apart—you’re not alone. Many assistants feel like reviews are one-sided, disconnected, or a total guessing game. (Whisper: and sometimes they are.)
But what if you looked at reviews differently?
What if you saw them not as a threat, but as an opportunity—an open window into exactly what your principal wants, how they define success, and how you can become indispensable?
Is it uncomfortable? Sometimes.
Is it necessary for growth? Absolutely.
Because that’s what a great review actually is: your playbook for leveling up.
1. Performance Reviews Aren’t Punishment—They’re Strategy
The biggest mindset shift you can make? Stop seeing performance reviews as a performance. They’re not a test. They’re an opportunity to learn.
Feedback is not an insult—it’s a resource. Use it. Ask for it. Crave it. Because the more clearly you understand what’s working and what’s not, the faster you can close the gap between where you are and where you want to be.
2. Ask Smarter Questions
If you’re not getting the information you need, consider changing your approach. Asking “Do you have any feedback?” is too broad. Instead, try:
“Do you feel like I’ve been anticipating your needs well enough?”
“Was the prep for the last board meeting what you had in mind?”
“Can we take 10 minutes to review how the event went so I can plan ahead for next time?”
The more specific the question, the more valuable the answer.
3. Review Up If You Can
Yes, you read that right. If the culture allows, ask your principal if they’d be open to a two-way review. It shows maturity, partnership, and a commitment to team success.
That doesn’t mean you criticize. It means you share thoughts on how the working relationship can improve. If you go this route, two things:
Deliver feedback the way you would want to hear it.
Be prepared to receive theirs the same way.
Don’t just point out gaps—offer solutions. And if you want help finding the right words? That’s where coaching comes in. Let’s talk.
Final Thoughts on Giving and Receiving Performance Reviews
Performance reviews are not a checkbox. They are not a punishment. And they are not something to fear. They are a chance to build trust, share clarity, and drive performance—for both parties.
Whether you’re the one giving the review or receiving it, here’s the truth: You don’t have to be perfect at this. You just have to be willing to learn, try, learn some more, and try again.
So get curious. Get clear. And take the feedback seriously.
Because how you handle this conversation? Says everything about how you lead—and how you grow.